Will Phillips
A British/Irish relationship and energy transformation coach based in Sitges, Barcelona.
I help people understand the emotional attachments, beliefs and relationship patterns that can leave them feeling stuck, disconnected or unsure what comes next.
My approach is warm, honest and practical. Together, we explore what you are experiencing, what matters to you and what you can realistically do differently. You do not need to arrive with the right words or a clear plan. We can start with where you are.
A little about me
I’m Will Phillips, founder of The RESET and The RESET Schools Programme. I’m British and now live in Sitges, near Barcelona, working online with English-speaking clients internationally.
As a gay man and an expat, I know that building a life that feels like your own can involve difficult decisions. Relationships, belonging and confidence do not always fall into place simply because you have moved somewhere new or made a fresh start.
My experience includes grief, loneliness, relationship change and rebuilding. Those experiences inform my perspective, but they do not define yours. I want to understand the person in front of me, rather than assume that what mattered in my life must matter in the same way in theirs.
The loss that changed my life
In 2021, I lost my mum very suddenly. She was 64, and I was one month away from turning 40.
Her death changed my life profoundly. There was the loss of someone I loved, but also the unfamiliar experience of carrying that loss into ordinary days. Life around you continues, even when your own sense of the world has changed.
I do not believe every painful experience needs to become a lesson. Some things are devastating, and there is no reassuring phrase that makes them otherwise.
Over time, though, I began to notice how this experience was changing what I valued: connection, honesty, kindness and the conversations we sometimes postpone. It also changed the way I understood vulnerability and the effort involved in finding direction again.
That experience became part of my motivation to support others. Not because I had found a formula for grief, but because I understood more deeply how important it is to feel heard without being hurried.
Losing my mum does not mean I know exactly how you feel. Every relationship and every loss is different. What it brings to my work is a personal awareness that someone can appear to be managing while finding everyday life very difficult.
How lived experience influences my coaching
I do not expect you to turn pain into positivity before we can work together.
You may still miss someone. You may feel uncertain about a relationship, lonely in a new place or disconnected from the person you thought you were becoming. We can acknowledge those feelings while exploring the choices available to you now.
Personal loss can involve more than bereavement. It may mean the end of a relationship, estrangement, relocation or letting go of a future you expected to have. Sometimes it is difficult to explain what has changed, even to yourself.
My lived experience influences how I listen, but it is not a substitute for professional training or specialist support. Coaching cannot remove grief, and I will not ask you to “get over” someone. Where coaching is appropriate, we can explore practical questions about daily life, relationships, confidence and direction.
What I mean by energy transformation
I believe energy is a powerful force in our lives. For me, it is more than a description of how tired or motivated we feel. It is part of how we connect with ourselves, with other people and with the possibilities we see ahead.
I also believe in manifestation: bringing intention, belief and action together around the life we want to create. I have experienced this personally. Living in Spain was once a possibility I imagined. Changing what I believed was possible, focusing on that direction and taking practical steps helped me make it my reality.
That is why energy transformation matters to me. Our thoughts can influence what we notice, the choices we make, the opportunities we pursue and what we feel able to attempt. Those choices can profoundly change how our lives unfold.
This is not about wishing and waiting. In our work together, we explore where your energy is going, which beliefs may be limiting you and how you can bring your daily actions closer to what you genuinely want.
That might mean moving from repeatedly seeking someone else’s approval towards trusting your own judgement, or giving less attention to an unavailable relationship and more to building meaningful connection.
It does not mean that painful experiences are your fault, or that the right thoughts can control other people or guarantee an outcome. Grief, uncertainty and difficult circumstances deserve compassion, not pressure to be positive.
For me, energy transformation is about recognising your capacity to influence your life, then putting that belief into practice with honesty, intention and action.
Emotional attachment, beliefs and relationship patterns
Knowing something logically and feeling able to act on it are not always the same.
You might recognise that a relationship is not meeting your needs and still find it difficult to step back. You might seek reassurance, hide your needs to avoid conflict or withdraw when someone gets close.
In coaching, we can explore these experiences without labelling you or diagnosing an attachment style. We look at the situation, the meaning you give it and the beliefs that may influence your response.
Questions we might consider include:
What are you hoping this person’s response will tell you about yourself?
What feels difficult about expressing what you need?
Which parts of this situation feel familiar?
What do you believe might happen if you set a boundary?
What choice would better reflect your values and self-respect?
Understanding a pattern is useful when it creates room for a different choice. We connect reflection with practical action, at a pace you can work with.
This is coaching around emotional attachment and relationship patterns, not clinical assessment or treatment for attachment trauma.
Who I help
I work with individuals and couples of every gender and sexual orientation. My particular focus is English-speaking gay men over 40, expats and people navigating significant personal change.
You might be looking for support because:
Dating or relationships keep bringing up familiar difficulties.
Heartbreak or rejection has affected your confidence.
You feel lonely, even when other people are around.
You find it difficult to express your needs or maintain boundaries.
Life abroad has left you without familiar support networks.
Personal loss has changed your priorities or sense of direction.
You want to make changes but struggle to turn intentions into action.
You do not need to identify with every point. The important question is whether the support you need fits what coaching can offer.
What working with me is like
I listen carefully, and I ask questions. Some will help you describe what you are feeling. Others may invite you to look again at an assumption or recognise a pattern you have been repeating.
My style is empathetic and direct. That does not mean confronting you for the sake of it. It means being willing to have an honest conversation while treating you with care and respect.
We agree what you want to focus on and work towards realistic next steps. A useful session might lead to a clearer decision, a conversation you want to prepare for or one small action to try before we meet again.
You remain responsible for your decisions. I will not tell you whether to stay in a relationship, prescribe the life you should lead or promise a particular result.
When working with couples, the aim is to understand what is happening between you and what each person needs. It is not about choosing a side or assuming that staying together is the only acceptable outcome.
Experience and professional boundaries
My coaching focuses on relationships, beliefs, confidence and practical personal change. I aim to be transparent about my experience and the limits of my role, so you can make an informed decision about working with me.
You are welcome to ask about my training, approach and relevant experience before booking paid coaching.
Life by Will provides coaching, not psychotherapy, counselling, specialist bereavement counselling, medical treatment or crisis support. I do not diagnose or treat mental-health conditions.
If your needs fall outside coaching, I will encourage you to seek support from an appropriately qualified professional. Coaching may sometimes sit alongside other support, but it does not replace it.
Before beginning, we will also discuss how sessions work, privacy and its limits, and the boundaries of any between-session contact.
Begin with a private conversation
You do not need to know exactly what needs to change before contacting me.
The free 30-minute RESET Clarity Call is an opportunity to explain what is happening, ask questions and explore whether my approach feels suitable for you.
It is a consultation rather than a coaching session. There is no obligation to continue, and you are welcome to take time afterwards to decide.
At a glance
Name: Will Phillips
Role: Relationship and energy transformation coach
Background: British/Irish
Based in: Sitges, Barcelona, Spain
Works with: Individuals and couples, particularly gay men over 40 and expats globally
Delivery: Online coaching internationally / 1:1 coaching locally in Barcelona area
Language: English
Focus: Relationships, emotional attachment, beliefs, loneliness, confidence and navigating personal change or loss
First step: A free 30-minute consultation